Spend This Time With Me
by csipal
Summary: He wondered if she knew that his truths only exist in dreams. Spoilers for Gum Drops. Kinda. GSR


**Disclaimer: **I don't own CSI or the characters. I just love to use at my will.

**A/N:** The spoilers for Gum Drops had me thinking. This is what I came up with. I didn't use a beta, so if you spot any mistakes, please overlook or give constructive criticism.

Based off spoilers for Gum Drops.

This is a little something I needed to write to help me get back into my current WIPs that are sitting there. Taunting me. Damn them. Ugh. Anyway, I want to thank everyone who nominated and voted for _To Everything There is a Season._ You will never know how shocked and pleased I was over that. You guys continue to amaze me. I haven't dropped that story or _Till We Get it Right_. I've just been busy and then busy turned into ... I don't know. It's going to get done - be patient with me, please. Having said that, I need to thank Laura, LK, mossley and I'm sure others, for helping me and listening to me bitch about my writer's block. And before this A/N becomes longer than this fic ...

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"You're not surprised to see me."

His statement was received with a raised brow and a twisted grin that lacked any amusement. The welcoming sweep of her arm gave away her exhaustion and resignation and he couldn't tell if that bothered him or not. There were parts of him that thrived on knowing he affected her. Small parts of him thought that as long as they still _felt _things, then they could be okay. Maybe they could function … together.

He followed her to the bed and settled himself at the foot as she burrowed into the covers, shoving one pillow under her head and the other between her legs. He wondered if she did this every night. If she shoved the pillow between her legs for comfort or to help keep her spine straight because of a back problem.

That did bother him.

He wanted to know.

"Are you going to ask me why I'm here?"

"No."

"Why not?"

She closed her eyes then, and he felt blocked out immediately. His head sank slowly as his elbows collapsed to his knees. He could feel the quiet anger radiating off her like flames, and waited for the first one to lick him.

But he didn't get burned.

Instead, there was a slight chill in the air when she spoke. Her tired and defeated voice - he didn't like it. He didn't like that she felt that way. He definitely didn't like that he made it so.

"Do you want me to ask, Grissom? Would you even give me an honest answer if I did?"

She didn't want honesty. Not the kind that he had. He knew she didn't. Maybe she did, but he didn't know how to give it.

"Maybe this wasn't a good idea."

No movement was made. He didn't go to the door and she didn't open her eyes.

"If you say so."

"You don't think?"

"I'm just trying to follow your lead, that's all."

He turned his head and found her looking at him. Her blinks here lazy, like she couldn't fight the cloud of sleep that descended on her, but he could tell that she was still with him, and focused … on him. The softness in her features and the warmth he imagined she created under the sheets made him ache. He wanted to be in that bed with her; to lay his head on her breast; to let her cloud of sleep weigh beautifully on him as well.

"And sometimes I should be following yours. I just want to be here. With you. Can I do that?"

"I wish things were different. I wish we were at the point where you didn't have to ask."

"Me too."

She wanted honesty and he gave it. Not the whole truth, but the important parts. He wondered if she knew that his truths only exist in dreams.

She closed her eyes again and this time he did move - to leave. He wanted to be near her - he always wanted to be near her. It was shocking to find out that even with her here, the gap between them still spanned the distance from Vegas to San Francisco.

"Cut off the light and come to bed."

Her whispered demand stopped him just as he reached the door. With his head bowed and his eyes closed, he released a shuddering breath. Suddenly he felt unworthy. She'd never let that tenuous thread holding them together break - she would just look for the stronger parts to hold on to.

"Sara -"

"Just come to bed."

And he did. He needed to find the strong parts of the tread, too.

He divested himself of most of his clothing, mildly shocked that he wasn't at all self-conscious. Leaving his undershirt and boxers on, he took her proffered hand and grazed the back of it with his thumb. She led him to her and he wondered if he ever would have found his way without her.

She guided his head to her breast and for the first time, he experienced a dream come true.

The cloud was getting heavier and his arms wrapped around her in hope that they could remain in this position for the remainder of the night.

Better yet - the remainder of their lives.

His foot caressed her calf and he smiled at the sleepy moan that rumbled through her chest. Comforting fingers grazed his scalp, lulling him into a state of drowsiness he hadn't experienced in so long.

"It's okay. This doesn't have to mean anything."

He tightened his hold on her and gently shook his head, banishing the words that left her lips.

"But it does. It does."

"Yeah."

It was whisper-light, but he felt her lips graze his forehead.


End file.
